There is another way. The author would have never found it on her own. Finding herself in handcuffs in the back of a police car at 21 was a wake-up call. What was different about her than her alcoholic mother whom she swore she would never be like?
Melissa grew up in a tumultuous home environment on welfare, in low-income apartments, with an Incarcerated father she had never met, an Alcoholic mother, and her abusive boyfriend.
After a DUI at 21 and court-ordered treatment, she learns about the effects of Addiction and slowly finds recovery of her health, mind, and body, and eventually builds a family of her own.
Anyone growing up in an alcoholic home knows that chaos and unpredictability affect our brains and nervous systems. We become hypervigilant, unable to relax or "have fun" We need to be inebriated to avoid looking at the pain that was caused. We find that by trying to avoid our issues with drinking and using we fall deeper until we find a way out, which for many is jail, institutions, or death.
Finding herself court-ordered to treatment and AA meetings she meets another trying to stay clean and gets pregnant at 8 months sober. Still, a child herself emotionally and reeling from a life of abuse, an absent father re-incarcerated, and a deep mother wound, she struggles.
It's not always pretty, but sobriety wins out and she realizes that not drinking and using drugs is the only way to create the life she wants to live. To be the mother and wife she strives to be. To be the woman God created her to be.
With 10/10 Adverse childhood experiences (ACES) Melissa strives to heal her childhood trauma while staying present enough to mother her children and find solutions to regulate her overwhelmed nervous system. She finds calm in the chaos and learns to manage her constant triggers.
Melissa is a woman who was able to break the cycle of addiction and abuse and hopes to carry the message to help others in recovery. It isn't easy, but it is possible.
This memoir celebrates the consistency of one day at a time-changing the trajectory of our lives. Falling and rising regardless of our circumstances. There is hope.
