The Age of Fat Asses

Pieter Pullin Holdemtite is so large and so great a messiah in Pineville's Holy Church of Knee-Sniffers that he has to be born of two mothers. He comes out in two pieces, a top and a bottom, and has to be glued together. His mothers are consumed at birth by locusts, which lead him to hate all bugs, and his father is a worthless drunk and is soon killed by his son. Pineville is under attack by outsiders, and the Distinguished Fat Asses install Pieter as judge, jury and executioner of anyone who dares cross into town. Seven feet tall and seven feet around, Pieter overwhelms his victims in a manner befitting a giant with a huge appetite for cows and bugs. Although he's immense after just a few months of life, his mental faculties have not developed beyond those of a three-year-old, until a beautiful, red-haired young woman, Sarah Lesthanluki, is presented to him as a victim. He falls in love and can not kill her, but she is not accepted by the Distinguished Fat Asses. Sarah and Pieter meet and love secretly, until the inevitable betrayal. The book is free for about the first week after publication.