Do You Like Me?: Breaking the Bondage of People Pleasing

Few questions shape human behavior more powerfully than the quiet, often unspoken plea: Do you like me? For many believers, this question governs decisions, relationships, communication, and even obedience to God. Do You Like Me? exposes how the fear of rejection and the craving for approval-what Scripture calls fear of man-silently enslave the heart.

This book begins by clarifying that fear of man is not a personality quirk or social insecurity. It is a worship issue. When approval becomes necessary for peace, people begin living before an audience rather than before God. Convictions are softened, boundaries compromised, truth delayed, and obedience negotiated-all in pursuit of acceptance.

Rick Thomas helps readers identify how approval-seeking develops and why it is so difficult to detect. Fear of man often disguises itself as kindness, empathy, flexibility, or humility. Beneath those virtues can lie a controlling desire to be liked, affirmed, or needed. When approval governs the heart, disappointment, anxiety, and resentment are never far behind.

The book traces how fear of man shapes everyday life. It influences communication, parenting, leadership, confrontation, conflict, and even one's approach to God. Readers are guided to see how people-pleasing, passivity, anger, avoidance, and relational exhaustion often flow from the same root: needing others to validate identity.

A central strength of Do You Like Me? is its application of the gospel to identity. Freedom from fear of man does not come from trying harder to be confident or less sensitive. It comes from anchoring identity in Christ's finished work. When God's acceptance becomes ultimate, human approval loses its controlling power.

Throughout the book, readers are encouraged to examine their internal dialogue-what they rehearse before conversations, how they interpret others' reactions, and how they respond to criticism or silence. These moments reveal where trust is placed. Practical biblical tools help replace approval-driven thinking with God-centered faith.

This resource is especially helpful for those who struggle with people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, anxiety, or relational fatigue. It is also valuable for counselors, pastors, leaders, and parents who want to understand how fear of man distorts relationships and decision-making. Reflection questions invite readers to slow down, repent honestly, and practice courageous obedience.

Do You Like Me? does not promote relational coldness or disregard for others. It calls readers to love people without being ruled by them. When fear of man loosens its grip, relationships grow freer, truth becomes clearer, and obedience becomes joyful rather than costly.

This book offers a hopeful, biblical path out of approval addiction and into God-centered freedom-where identity is secure, courage grows, and love is no longer transactional.

Life Over Coffee Publishers