Realizing My Post Cancer Self ― Memoir of an Ovarian Cancer Survivor

With no family history of cancer and 2 days of vaginal spotting one month apart, in 2008 at age 67, I was diagnosed with high grade serous IIIC ovarian cancer and given a 25-35 percent chance of living 5 years. Within a week, I was incompletely debulked and 4 weeks later began 18 months of chemotherapy.Recovering from cancer surgery and chemotherapy was challenging, but was nothing compared to coping with the psychological damage such a diagnosis renders. Prior to retirement, I was a former registered nurse and a college professor of American Literature and Women's Studies. After retirement, I took up painting as a hobby. Coping with life as a cancer survivor required me to make considerable adjustments. Whereas I'd always been active and confident before cancer, afterwards I felt weak, old, vulnerable and depressed.Because I wanted to be brave, I stifled my feelings and became quiet. But silence only increasd my depression. Consequently, I picked up my brushes and began painting my feelings by creating my twin Altheaannette who was an "upfront and out there" character who brazenly, motored through recovery and into remission taking me with her. My "teal twin" saved me.By 2013, I had outlived my "expiration date" and began writing this memoir. I've used my paintings to illustrate my thoughts and feelings throughout my journey. I write about redefining myself as a survivor/advocate whose goals include educating others about ovarian cancer, supporting all survivors emotionally, and raising money for ovarian cancer research. Consequently, all royalties from my books will be donated to ovarian cancer research. In addition, I invite readers to visit my website at altheaannettedesigns.com to see new research postings, my new artwork, and comprehensive support materials. I also welcome dialogue with other cancer survivors.