Trapped. Suffocated. Isolated. Desperate. These, among many other confusing and frustrating emotions, were constant realities as I lived with my three young sons fearing what the next minute might hold.
Everyday life was a heart check as to whether or not staying in this destructive marriage was God's actual will for us. Was I making the right decisions about how I was caring for myself and the children? Was I being selfish? Was I conveniently making excuses for my own comfort?
Thankfully, as I was becoming more frighteningly aware of my circumstances, God began to show me in big and little ways that He was right there with us, and I was able to increasingly trust Him as He guided us through the confusion. Through daily interactions with friends, family, nature, and His Word, God not only met me in my lowest points but gave me enough peace to get me to my next breath. Through a series of "God sightings," He strengthened me, gave me the courage to face each day, and provided a way of escape--"a way out so that [I could] endure"
(1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT).
The private and complicated pain of being in an abusive Christian marriage is seldom discussed. Yet, it exists, and once women recognize the subtle signs of abuse, they will be empowered to protect themselves and their families from the dangers of domestic violence. Can't You Smell the Smoke? is an encouragement for women traveling through the desperate minefield of an abusive marriage to a narcissist, showing them they can not only survive but thrive once God provides escape.
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